Friendly Avoidance

Dear Jitters,

       I have this very close friend. She is like a family member to me. I usually come up with really good ideas, or maybe I ask her to do a favor, but she always says no to everything. I will ask her if she wants my Twinkie, and her answer will be “No.”




Dear Anonymous,

       Greetings! If I understand correctly, it looks like your very close friend is avoiding you for reasons unclear. This is a particularly confusing situation, and it’s understandable to be at a bit of a standstill. I can tell you from experience that the worst thing you could do for yourself, your friend, and the situation is to worry about it too much. While it’s rational to reflect upon some of the things you have said or done recently that may have hurt her feelings, you needn’t drive yourself crazy. It could be that she is simply going through a difficult time, during which she would rather just keep to herself. Regardless of why she’s giving you the cold shoulder, it wouldn’t hurt to ask her (without confronting her) why she hasn’t been quite as friendly lately. In fact, it might allow her to see that you care enough about the friendship to care at all.

I wish you the best of luck!